you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
But I just had this pork pt. It was dick grabbing.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
