The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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