i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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