We won't sleep together?
Where is the hickey?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
