Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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