overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
stop calling my apartment porn island.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
