um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize