So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
