I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
