At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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