I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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