Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
