just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize