god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
