You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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