she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
This is classic penis vs brain.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize