i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
