none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize