Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize
