Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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