She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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