you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
