used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
