Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
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