the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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