Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
