Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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