after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Your cock deserves a montage
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
