Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
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