Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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