their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
