youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
