he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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