So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
