Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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