She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
