dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
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