yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
