he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
