Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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