yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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