Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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