You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize