Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
id be glad to
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
