Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
