there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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