I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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