I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
