I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
