We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I am available for nakedness
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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